"It is totally unacceptable to have such a monster like Adolf Hitler on public display," he told the Post. "How this could happen is beyond my understanding and comprehension."
Two years ago, a Thai school sponsored a celebration that involved a Nazi-theme parade for sports day. Photos showed students with swastikas on their baseball caps behind a large sign with "NAZI" in shoulder-high letters.
Also a commercial for potato chips depicted Hitler giving a Nazi salute and then showed a lady who cast a spell on him as he ate the chips, hoping to change his evil ways. A Nazi swastika morphed into a logo and the transformation was complete.
Also, a "Nazi Bar" opened in Bangkok, featuring photos of Nazi storm troopers with waiters wearing swastika armbands. The bar's manager said it had a "powerful, catchy and emotional appeal."
The bar has sincechanged its name to "No Name Bar" after bad publicity abroad.
Apparently on the other hand, there are many in Thailand who believe the poster refers to an Israeli leader, in the wake of a report passed by the United Nations this week, that accuses Israel of war crimes in Gaza.
Apparently on the other hand, there are many in Thailand who believe the poster refers to an Israeli leader, in the wake of a report passed by the United Nations this week, that accuses Israel of war crimes in Gaza.
The following is Joe's premonition of an average afternoon
in his own lifetime when the last commoners of the great UK nation not carrying
a shiny new ID card and TV licences are a few dozen protestant dissidents
leading dogs on a bit of twine and hanging around Free Derry whining about
freedom.
[Scene 1 ..The Post Office. When: In the not-too-distant future...]
Joe: Hello, I'd like to renew my car tax.
Post Office: Certainly sir. Would you care to speed things up by using
your identity card?
Joe: Ahem yes, that would seem to be a jolly fine idea.
PO: Let me just rub it on my jumper and swipe it... Mr. Cooper... Is
this the tax on the clapped-out Astra?
Joe: Yes.
PO: Bit of trouble with the MOT this time I see. Jaysus that wasn't
cheap! Still, at least the speeding points come off your licence in December , that's something to look forward to. Bloody hell, that Magistrate really hammered you didn't he? Probably took exception to that membership of Amnesty Internationals back in your student days. Six months or twelve?
Joe: I was only in it for four months...
PO: Not according to this. Actually, I meant the car tax.
Joe: Oh right. Twelve.
PO: How would you like to pay?
Joe: Barclayard.
PO: No, you're up to your limit on that, what about the Capital One
Card?
Joe: I don't have one.
PO: Says here you do... oh hang on... no the bloke using that is in
Liverpool at the moment buying DVD players. He's run up quite a bill for
you there mate. Try the Switch card.
Joe: Here you go.
PO: No, something wrong here, won't let me complete the transaction.
Let's have a look... ah... yes... your TV licence has expired. Are you
going to pay that too?
Joe: Well, I thought I would leave it till next month.
PO: On your head be it. Do you want some Euros while we're at it? Two
weeks in Marbella, eh, you lucky devil. I see you're flying BA. Good
choice.
Joe: Er, yes I'll do that now. Give me 500 in mixed notes.
PO: It'll have to be 200 I'm afraid. The car tax has taken a bite out
of your funds and your monthly ID card purchase fee direct debit is due
out of the account tomorrow. Right, there you go. Have a nice day sir.
Tesco checkout
Joe: Hello, can you sell me a one-month travel insurance policy?
Tesco: Yes sir, let me have your ID card... Thanks. Do you have any
current health problems?
Joe: No, nothing.
Tesco: You sure, sir?
Joe: Yes, why?
Tesco: Well it says here you were at the doctor's last week.
Joe: Oh, that was nothing serious.
Tesco: Let me just... Oh yes, touch of the old Farmer Giles... No that
wont be a problem. Probably sitting on cheap charter flight seats
that's to blame. I see you're going British Airways this time around,
though. Very wise. Oops, pressed the wrong button. [Picture of Joe Cooper's
hideously empiled anus appears on every plasma screen in the shop,
accompanied by name, address, telephone number and email address].
Old lady in queue: Oooh they look sore dear. Have you tried Anusol?
Tesco: I see your car had a bit of a struggle with the MOT. Garage not
keen on Communists?
Joe: Can we just do the travel insurance, and these frozen peas?
Tesco: Peas? Shall I just check that don't have a genetic
predisposition to pea allergy? It'll only take a minute to scan your genome... I
understand. You're in a bit of a hurry. Very good sir. Next please.
At the Bank
Joe: Hello, I’d like to open a deposit account please.
Bank Clerk: Can I see your ID?
Joe: Do I have to?
BC: Yes. It will speed things up and prevent identity theft while
ensuring that only those entitled to state benefits receive them. And it
will prevent all forms of terrorism, everywhere, for ever.
Joe: Yes of course. Here you go...
BC: Right… Mr Cooper… How may I help? Would you like a cushion?
Joe: Sorry?
BC: Oh, I just thought... the frozen peas helped then?
Joe: Can we just do the bank account?
BC: Of course sir. Right, you already have a current account with us
but your holiday funds pretty well put paid to that until payday. Hmmm...
Oh dear this Capital One Account is all over the place and your
Barclaycard is at the limit. I see you've opted to pay the BBC television licence
a month late and your car is on its last legs. You don't look like a
very good risk to me, sir.
Joe: Hang on. The Capital One Card is nothing to do with me. That's some
bloke buying DVD players in Liverpool.
BC: You seem to know an awful lot about him, sir.
Joe: But it's not me, the chap in the Post Office told me...
BC: Lets look at the biometrics... Yes you're right, it's not you...
Joe: Thank goodness for the ID card eh?
BC: Indeed sir, and just as soon as you get the Capital One Card paid
off we will be glad to welcome you as a customer.
Joe: But it wasn't me!
BC: No, but you seem to have known all about it since 09.43 this
morning and haven't bothered to notify your card issuer.
Joe: Every bugger else seems to know about it; why didn't Capital One do
something?
BC: Steady sir, there is the civil liberties angle. We can't just go
round invading an individual's privacy willy-nilly you know. Oh crikey, I
see you've taken out travel insurance. It doesn't appear to cover you
for misuse of your Capital One card. Would you like a quote for that?
Home, sweet home
[Doorbell rings]
Travelling salesman: Mr Cooper? I am Terry MvGuinness the local
distributor for Anusol and...
TV licence enforcement: [Arriving behind the salesman] Mr Cooper, I'm
Chris Russell of the TV licencing authority. Here's my ID card.
Instant credit salesman: [Arriving behind TV licence enforcement] Our
records show that you're a bit strapped for cash at the moment. If you'd
just sign here I can offer you £5,000 right now at just 1,375,893
monthly repayments of £11.40.
PSNI and the Anti Terrorist Squad: [Arriving behind instant credit salesman] Can we
have a word Mr Cooper? We gather that you lied this morning to a Post
Office operative about the period of time you spent in 1992 as a member
of Amnesty International the protectors of the soft underbelly and you have being posting scurrilous posts
about the BBC . I have to caution you that under section 12 of the...
Travelling Salesman: [Snatching card] Hold on, I was here first. You'll
all get a chance to swipe... Oh yes, Mr Cooper, those are clearing up
nicely. Now, do you want me to give you something for that pea allergy?
BBC BRUTISH BULLSCUTTER COPERATION
Don't even give them a chance to launch their Bullscutter !
Oh, no. Brutish Bullscutter Coperation. Don't come fucking near me today. Dear Jaysus, you Kerry fucking recruits and gobshites all over the Irish media are their by-product. There are so many things I could say to express my deep mistrust and yes, anger of these new media Irish opinion makers. Their world service can be a titillating export but their rampant censorship of the restless native's replies stinks to high heaven, of arrogance, cultural imperialism and age old repression.
I don't vote right wing as far as I know, so maybe that also explains my antagonism to them. I don't believe the Brutish Bullscutter Coperation, which henceforth will be simply called the BBC, offer anything approximating legitimate alternatives for this country, indeed any country but thats their business. I disagree with their monarchy, class system of commoners, lords, inherited privilige and intolerance of diversity or alternatives.
Lest you think nationalism is blinding me, do not confuse my rants against Brutish Bullscutter with the many Scottish, English and Welsh friends I have known down through the years, most of whom are the salt of the Earth in my opinion and great people.
It goes against every fibre of my being and tradition to be rude to people but you have got to stand up for your identity these days or become a smiling zombie product of their pundits and seductive manipulating bullscutter.
Brutes are people too but we must take this tour d'arse with all of its insanity, as a relief from the bland sanitized, couldn't give a fuck mercenary BULLSCUTTER ! of our age.
